Rehearsal was scary today. We got the costumes in, so we all got to do the Costume Parade for Mrs. Felice. I had a loose blue suit and the most hideous black dress in existence. It's decorated with a pattern of bamboo shoots, I believe. I also get the world's most laughable hat. It reminds me of that thing the "Bring out your dead" guy wore in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Anyway, while we were still showing Mrs. Felice our first costumes, she pulled Casey (the other Emily) and me aside. She said she didn't want to discuss it in front of the boys. (As if they wouldn't find out!) She told us that because we both have good figures and old ladies don't, she wanted us to have -- there's no other phrase to describe it -- sagging breasts. She suggested putting oranges in our bras. I went back to the changing room laughing so hard I was crying. I would go from a double-A to a double-D in one night. Don't you wish you were coming to our performance, now?