I have a passion for bad poetry. Here are some of the dorkier samples.
Dresden Files Limericks
(composed for the Jim-Butcher.com Forums)
There once was a wizard named Harry
Who fought against monsters quite scary
'Til he cried out "I'm done!,"
Tossed his staff and his gun,
And picked up Little House on the Prairie.
The sexy reporter named Susan
Was the lady of our wizard's choosin'.
But one vamping later,
Her strength is much greater:
More suited for bringin' the bruisin'.
There once was a copper named Karrin
(One half of my favourite pairin')
Though she can be quite kind
She will sure speak her mind
When asked how her love life is farin'.
There once was a spirit named Bob
Remembering things was his job.
Like how to make potions
From calamine lotions
Or flee from a ravening mob.
Ode to Lockhart
(composed for Tanja's guestbook)
Gilderoy, oh Gilderoy.
You're the man that I'd employ.
For the D.A.D.A. job.
Much better than that Lupin slob!
Gilderoy, dear Gilderoy
You always were a brilliant boy
You aced all quizzes and your tests,
You outshine (by far) all the rest.
'Cause Gilderoy, yes, Gilderoy,
You know that magic's not a toy
You fight the Dark Arts every day
For hardly any wage or pay.
And Gilderoy, dear Gilderoy,
You're not egotistical at all or coy
You're the pinnacle of modesty
Now about your fifteenth biography...
Love Sonnet
(written for English class)
After a weary day
I return to you
I am welcomed by your familiar face
I am bathed in your radiant glow
I stay awake late at night in your company
I dream of you as I sleep
And when I arise in the morning,
I smile as my eyes fall on you
My soul aches when we are apart
My heart leaps at our afternoon reunion.
My friends could never understand my affection,
But I could never resist the strong, silent “type”.
My computer, my love
I am lost without you