More “Kids Rewriting History”:
Abraham Lincoln became America’s greatest Precedent. Lincoln’s
mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which
he built with his own hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves
by signing the Emasculation Proclamation. On the night of April
14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat
by one of the actors in a moving picture show. They believe
the assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposingly insane
actor. This ruined Booth’s performing career.
Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions which
produced a large number of children. In between he practiced on
an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from
1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the
world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian,
and half English. He was very large.
Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he
wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when
everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and
later died for this.
The nineteenth century was a time of a great many thoughts and
inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started
reproducing by machine. The invention of the steamboat caused
a network of rivers to spring up. Cyrus McCormick invented the
McCormick raper, which did the work of a hundred men. Louis
Pasteur discovered a cure for rabbits. Charles Darwin was a
naturalist who wrote the Organ of the Species. Madman Curie
discovered the radio. And Karl Marx became one of the Marx
Brothers.
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