More “Kids Rewriting History”:

Abraham Lincoln became America’s greatest Precedent. Lincoln’s

mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which

he built with his own hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves

by signing the Emasculation Proclamation. On the night of April

14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat

by one of the actors in a moving picture show. They believe

the assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposingly insane

actor. This ruined Booth’s performing career.

Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions which

produced a large number of children. In between he practiced on

an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from

1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the

world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian,

and half English. He was very large.

Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he

wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when

everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and

later died for this.

The nineteenth century was a time of a great many thoughts and

inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started

reproducing by machine. The invention of the steamboat caused

a network of rivers to spring up. Cyrus McCormick invented the

McCormick raper, which did the work of a hundred men. Louis

Pasteur discovered a cure for rabbits. Charles Darwin was a

naturalist who wrote the Organ of the Species. Madman Curie

discovered the radio. And Karl Marx became one of the Marx

Brothers.

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