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Stupid, stinking, fat math exam! We hates them!

But I don’t have to cram all the stuff for Moment on my sheet, so it’s all good I can pretend for the time being that everything is okay and I’m not going to fail miserably it’s all good.

Me: Is Moment going to be on the exam?

Dan: No, it’s not.

Priya: Is center of mass on the exam?

Dan: No, it’s from the same chapter. And I spent 2 hours learning it, gah.

Me: Well, now you know, and this knowledge will enrich your life.

Dan: Yeah, sure.

Me: What if you’re walking down the block one day and someone runs up to you and says “I NEED TO FIND THE MOMENT ABOUT THE X AND Y AXES FOR THIS DISCRETE LAMINA OF CONTINUOUS MASS!”

Dan: I would say “I don’t know. I have it on my Cheat Sheet.”

Me: But what if you had your Cheat Sheet with you? You could save a life!

Dan: I should shoot myself for being that uncool.

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As Blogger has no convenient equivalent to LJ-cut, my review of RotK shall be a bit different! I definitely don’t want to spoil it for those who haven’t seen it, which I imagine is the majority of my readership at this point, I shall omit all names and particularly revealing nouns and verbs, much in the style of military censorship. That way, those who have seen the movie will probably know what I’m talking about, but those who haven’t seen it can easily skip the block of text without their eyes accidentally catching a spoilery word! Or, they could read the review and use the blank spaces like Mad Libs. Crazy fun for the whole family!

&ltreview&gt

Originally I was a tad disappointed that no one had dressed up. Last year, the high point of Waiting In Line was the guy dressed as Merry, flanked by two dwarves, carring a banner that said “Saruman is Gay.” (nice try, boys. wrong actor! It’s Gandalf!) But Philly is a big city with lots of theatres, and The Bridge mainly caters to students, and with exam week, no one had any time to get costumes together, I’d imagine. I got quite a few compliments on my “Still the Prettiest” shirt and even gave a fellow geek a disk with “The Very Secret Diaries” on it.

I was one of three people to bring a laptop with which to watch TTT:EE in line. Gah, over break, I must see this movie again! When I actually can hear it and I don’t have to rely on subtitles! (Man, the subtitles are WORTHLESS. I mean, when you have captioned movies, aren’t you supposed to include SOUNDS, as well? Like “hoofbeats” and “speaking in Elvish” such? Ah well.) Still, so much wonderful that wonderful doesn’t even begin to cover it.

Then the movie started!

I have been officially reduced to a puddle of emotional goo. This movie had me (and the entire audience) laughing out loud, then cheering, then bawling in my seat, and all probably within a span of ten minutes. I don’t even want to think about how much tissue I went through in that movie.

I think the first thing I do when I finish my math exam is to purchase the RotK soundtrack. _____’s voice? GUH. I’m so glad I didn’t get the soundtrack beforehand and resisted the temptation to listen when all the fangirls on the _____ LJ community were squealing about it. My beautiful baby ______ singing about ________ while ________ sends all his men to their ______. (And DUDE, apparently he COMPOSED the song! Wow, what can’t he do?) And that other time, when he and _____ are singing and dancing on the table? Man nothing like auxiliary backup _______ for cheering up a crowd. I LOVE ALL FOUR OF MY _______ SO MUCH THERE ARE NO WORDS.

Well, actually, there are two words: Longbottom leaf. THANK YOU, PETER JACKSON.

Mkay. Frodo and Sam and Gollum climbing the ______ to ______’s ____? Order: Gollum, Frodo, Sam. Good grief, Frodo has suffered enough. He does NOT need that kind of view.

I LOVE SAM AND I LOVE FRODO AND I LOVE PIPPIN AND I LOVE MERRY AND I LOVE EOWYN AND I LOVE GIMLI AND I LOVE LEGOLAS AND I LOVE PIPPIN AGAIN AND I LOVE GANDALF AND I LOVE FARAMIR AND I LOVE ARAGORN AND DID I MISS ANYONE? I LOVE THEM TOO.

Mkay, who read Sam’s lips in that last scene? *raises hand* SO CUTE. Even if you hadn’t read the books, you totally know his first ___’s name is _____.

Ship-Wise, _______ and _______ are so in love it’s not even funny. Near the end, after _______ is _______ by Gandalf and meeting everyone in the crowd and they share that manly shoulder-hug thing and it lasts way too long to be platonic and they just GAZE at each other? D00d! Meanwhile, him and _____? Yawnage.

Gandalf telling Pippin what _____ would be like? Me = SOBBING MESS.

Smeagol. WOAH.

Gollum. WOAH.

Sam. WOAH.

The entire movie. WOAH.

So who’s seeing it again with me when I get home?

&lt/review&gt

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::laughs:: It’s so funny, because it’s so true! This totally happened to me on my birthday with X2. Down to the detail about the aunt and uncle and the impossibility to buy for! But I used cunning wiles to avoid unwrapping the plastic, then privately approached my uncle and asked him if he would be offended if I switched it for the widescreen, so all was hunky-dory.

And now I’m off to LotR! Two and a half hours early, but I checked out the TTT:EE for the night to keep us company. Hurrah!

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#1 Item on things that are NOT COOL: Finding out your math exam in on Thursday, when the little course schedule thingy at the beginning of the year said it was going to be Friday. Man, I would have studied harder TODAY! Wow, someone isn’t leaving her room tomorrow…

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*dies laughing* Rachel used Tricia and Carmen as models for her latest photography project, and after she turned everything in, the three of them did this on Carmen’s door with one of the extra prints. I love these girls.

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Gah. Today has been one stupid mistake after another. XP

First, I got my portfolio all lovely and organized for my critique at 11:30. At 11:15, I headed over to the art building to get everything set up. Then I realized I had forgotten my thumbtacks to hang my work! So I ran back to my dorm. Along the way, I thought “hey! I should print out my pirate CG to show her how I’m applying what I learned in this class! So I printed it. Then I ran back, arriving at 11:31. My teacher was critiquing another student, so I sat down to wait for them to finish. At 11:50, I started to get confused. Why were they going so far into my time? Were they already that off schedule so early in the morning? So I found the signup sheet on the wall and saw that I had signed up for 1:30. *facepalm* Glad it wasn’t the other way around.

So with an hour and a half to burn, I decided to go catch a taxi to Pierre’s, the costume shop, to get another pair of elf ears for tonight. The ones I wore for my Nightcrawler costume are permanently blue, so unless I wanted to be an elf with gangrene, I needed another pair. I leafed through the back of my Book, where I keep addresses, and I couldn’t find a listing for Pierre’s. “3rd and Arch” I told the cabdriver, relying on memory. But when we finally got there, the store was nowhere to be seen. I looked through my Book again, and there it was, on the inside cover, the other place I keep addresses. Hah. So we went to the real address and found Pierre’s. Yay.

I asked the cab driver to wait outside for me, as it would only be the briefest of moments, and it’s in a part of town where there are never any taxis, so I would have to walk quite a ways to find one (learned from experience last time!). So I went to the display, only to see that there were no ears. I asked a store attendant, who told me that the shipment hadn’t gotten in yet. Just great.

I went back to the cab, acting as though my mission had been successful, but highly disappointed inside. As we rounded the block (crazy one-way streets), a sudden thought struck me. Hey! The store has flesh-colored liquid latex! I could just paint over my Kurt ears! But because of my previous mistake, I decided that he would think I was a moron if I asked him to turn around and take me back. Five minutes I agonized. Should I? Shouldn’t I? Finally, I snapped, and asked him to take me back. He sighed loudly, clearly feeling very put-upon.

So I got the liquid latex, no fuss, paid the now rather fat cab bill, and went back to my dorm. I dug out all my makeup stuff and the old ears and started painting. But at the third layer, I realized it wasn’t going to cut it. The blue was incredibly stubborn and kept showing through. And the multiple layers of latex were building up in weird ways, getting a bit bumpy and nasty. Wearing them, I would look more like an orc. Finally, at 1:10, I gave up and went off to my critique. So now, not only will I have no ears to wear tonight, but I also destroyed my Kurt ears. Ah, well. Such is life.

Thankfully, Karma caught back up with me in time for my critique, so it went fabulously. But still, wah.

::sigh::

EDIT: And now yet ANOTHER person has emailed me to cancel on the movie tonight. Three people in the last three days. Glad I still have Rachel and Carmen. *shakes fist at the Jing, Abe, and Sam.* Hey, Allison! Do you have tickets yet?

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Alicey and I just spent the last while goggling over the scaryness that is this link. I am so glad that I didn’t grow up in a family with those kind of beliefs. Holy cow.

EDIT: It is a parody! Gah, okay, feeling better now. I kept thinking that it had to be one, but gah.