• 07:08 Dear Priscilla, You are not allowed to wear your "Cake Or Death" shirt when going to see the doc who put you on a cake-eliminating cleanse. #
  • 07:31 @TeamHusbands Can previous episodes be moved to a different page? Loading EVERYTHING is really slowing down my browser. LOVING the show! #
  • 11:03 Finished @ScottWesterfeld’s GOLIATH, read superbly by Alan Cumming. Next: @scalzi’s FUZZY NATION and Sherwood Smith’s INDA. #FridayReads #
  • 12:24 The internet singularity approaches: t.co/PUapSJqD #
  • 12:56 Coworkers and I gathered around a microphone to sing bits of a song (memorably covered on Glee) for a spot. @321LaunchNY Glee is in session! #
  • 12:59 "Mr. Schu, I think I should get the solo!" I exclaimed petulantly. Then later, "Are people going to throw slushies at us now?" #LaunchGlee #
  • 13:04 A male coworker gave me the L-on-the-forehead gesture. It was epic. #LaunchGlee #
  • 14:06 Gay soldier booed by GOP debate audience: t.co/bzSdpQLZ #
  • 15:06 @caseyreuter Soooo gooood. t.co/iyh5yqbo #
  • 16:40 People keep randomly bursting into song today. I wish the all-singing, all-dancing workplace could endure forever! #
  • 16:42 I love that two of you immediately made Buffy references. I am friends with the exact right sort of people. #
  • 16:48 @theliz13 @seananmcguire PICTURES. I may require a cuttlefish to be BFF with my sparkly pink and purple plush octopus, Squidaped Oyt. #
  • 17:15 @theliz13 Very cute! I think I’ll pass, though. Hope he finds a great home! #< /li>
  • 18:39 Boss treated all employees to donuts, coffee, pizza, and chocolate cake. My universe is pain and emptiness. #cleanseofdoom #
  • 18:44 @clarkvalentine Hee, no, it was totally awesome and generous of him! But I’m on an extremely restrictive cleanse and can eat none of it. :D #
  • 18:47 @myyrdneopia I’ll still be on the cleanse during NYCC. No sugar, to start. t.co/HcAm5MnI #
  • 18:49 Clarification: I am not ungrateful for my boss’s generosity! I’m chafing under a month-long cleanse with very strict dietary limitations. #
  • 19:16 @clarkvalentine I actually had gluten-free, no-cheese veggie pizza last night! It was divine! #
  • 21:42 @hobbitwriter Don’t use FB or blog much. For me, Twitter = Stuff you want folks to see, and G+: = Stuff you want folks to talk about. #
  • 22:23 Cool NYT article about @longshotauthor and other AmberMUSHers who made good, incl @ce_murphy @boymonster & @chotiari. t.co/DFn9BkiH #
  • 22:32 @byharryconnolly @myyrdneopia SO MUCH PRETTY. #
  • 23:36 @nerdyorkcity They can’t compare with the cupcakes at Sugar Sweet Sunshine in the lower east side! #

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  • 07:51 @jkeller87 I have mixed feelings. I think it was very well written, but some of the author’s choices frustrated me. Still ruminating. #
  • 08:37 @chriscolfer I look forward to Glee’s performance of "Razzle Dazzle." :D #
  • 12:06 My coworkers and I are doodling a round-robin illustrated story about a fox. It is trippy beyond belief. My coworkers are kind of awesome. #
  • 17:24 Holy yeesh. I just realized that starting Sunday, I won’t be allowed meat for three weeks. Gotta schedule my Epic Indian Feast for tomorrow! #
  • 22:01 Oh, #Community, how I missed you! How glorious it is that you have returned to me! #

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  • 08:38 Today is my mom’s birthday! She has every quality you could ever dream of in a mom, and she’s MINE, MINE, MWAHAHAHA! I love you! #
  • 08:40 Out of all the awesomeness at NYCC, I think I’m most excited about @JonHoche’s GALACTIC GIRL t.co/EPC5V6YA #
  • 10:35 @boymonster Yes, I refer to myself as a girl. It’s a word that depends on context; sometimes it feels condescending, other times it’s fine. #
  • 11:42 @SarahWatson42 I heard "erotic," but "ironic" makes more sense… #
  • 13:15 I am fantasizing about cooking a sumptuous gluten and dairy-free Indian foodgasm this weekend and eating it forever. #
  • 14:03 @sinspired Indian food. Forever. Like the last panels of this comic: t.co/PRb5tEgh #
  • 17:27 My coworkers have coined the word "broetry," meaning "poetry written by bros." Who will be the first to write me a broem? #
  • 17:53 @fredhicks ::cheers wildly:: #
  • 18:18 @RyanMacklin Great mi nds think alike! #
  • 18:44 @Esperacchius Broerick, Bronnet, Brodda, Brostina… All forms of broetry are welcome! #
  • 19:11 @seananmcguire *offers you a coworker’s arm* #
  • 19:14 Finished @leverus’ The Magician King. Now moving to @ScottWesterfeld’s Goliath. Huzzah for tone whiplash! :D #
  • 22:05 People across the street have been shouting "OW" in chorus for OVER TWO HOURS. #
  • 22:09 RT @SaraBareilles: I’m not political, but….t.co/8FfQR5ve // Genius! #
  • 22:13 @anglophile80 IT’S SEPTEMBER. #
  • 23:18 All the Things: Beta’d! #

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  • 11:40 The m-w.com WOTD is "doughty," which I learned from reading @longshotauthor books. Fact: books make your brain awesome. #
  • 12:15 Today is DAY ONE of my Detox Clenseamajiggy! Observation the first: Finding a gluten-free place that DOES serve meat will be a challenge. #
  • 12:24 @JonHoche Huzzah! Thanks! #
  • 13:26 I can has amaranth! Mmm, the nutritious, gluten-free whole grain that is high in protein and calcium and reminds me of the Codex Alera! #
  • 13:27 @seananmcguire They are so pret ty! Fluuuffffffffffyyyyyyyyy… #
  • 13:31 RT @fredhicks: Flying around the Earth j.mp/qaiI2Z // Extraordinary! #
  • 15:18 The cinematography on this season of #DoctorWho is gorgeous! And this episode was awesome. #
  • 20:42 @gillyperkygoth LOL! YES! #
  • 21:10 OMG Series 2 of Downton Abbey started tonight in the UK! GRABBYHAAAAAANDS. #
  • 21:14 I bought an appalling number of audiobooks in @audible_com’s $4.95 sale. Someone should take away my Grown-Up card. #
  • 21:51 @RobJDurand Nope, it’s read very capably by William Dufris. #
  • 23:07 WTF, Emmys "In Memoriam" section, where’s Elisabeth Sladen? #

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I started this blog eleven years ago, and for most of those years, I actually blogged faithfully. Then I got sucked into Twitter, and I got a 50-hour/week job, and my blogging practices atrophied and died.

However, I now have a reason to blog again.

I’m embarking upon a month long cleanse with an extremely narrow range of foods I can eat. Any of these limitations individually are doable, but together, they’re very intimidating. By blogging about my efforts, I can wrangle my teeming thoughts and concerns into something coherent and manageable. I can post recipes and restaurant reviews to remind myself of all the cool options available to me. The blog will also provide a place for me to solicit advice from folks who have undertaken similar dietary restrictions. And who knows, it may prove helpful to future foodies, looking to improve their diet!

Here’s what I’m facing:

Basic Dietary Guidelines:

FRUITS
INCLUDE: Unsweetened fresh, frozen, water-packaged, or canned fruits; fruit juices (except orange).
EXCLUDE: Oranges, orange juice.

VEGETABLES
INCLUDE: All fresh raw, steamed, sauteed, juiced, or roasted vegetables.
EXCLUDE: Corn, creamed vegetables. I will also exclude spinach, as I have a sensitivity to it. This sucks, as spinach is my favorite vegetable.

STARCH
INCLUDE: Rice, oats, millet, quinoa, amaranth, teff, tapioca, buckwheat.
EXCLUDE: Wheat, corn, barley, spelt, kamut, rye; all gluten-containing products.

BREAD/CEREAL
INCLUDE: Products made from rice, oat, buckwheat, milley, potato flour, tapioca, arrowroot, amaranth, quinoa, teff.
EXCLUDE: Products made from wheat, spelt, kamut, rye, barley; all gluten-containing products.

LEGUMES
INCLUDE: All beans, peas, and lentils (unless otherwise indicated)
EXCLUDE: Soybeans, tofu, tempeh, soy milk, other soy products.

NUTS AND SEEDS
INCLUDE: Almonds, cashews, walnuts, sesame (tahini), sunflower, pumpkin seeds; butters made from these nuts and seeds.
EXCLUDE: Peanuts, peanut butter.

MEAT AND FISH
INCLUDE: All canned (water-packed), frozen, or fresh fish, chicken, turkey, wild game, lamb.
EXCLUDE: Beef, pork, cold cuts, frankfurters, sausage, canned meats, eggs, shellfish.

DAIRY PRODUCTS AND MILK SUBSTITUTES
INCLUDE: Milk substitutes such as rice milk, almond milk, oat milk, coconut milk, and other nut milks.
EXCLUDE: Milk, cheese, cottage cheese, cream, yogurt, butter, ice cream, frozen yogurt, non-dairy creamers. I must add coconut milk to the “exclude” pile as well, as I’m sensitive to coconut.

FATS
INCLUDE: Cold-expeller pressed olive, flaxseed, canola, safflower, sunflower, sesame, walnut, pumpkin, or almond oils.
EXCLUDE: Margarine, butter, shortening, processed and hydrogenated oils, mayonnaise, spreads.

BEVERAGES
INCLUDE: Filtered or distilled water, herbal tea, seltzer or mineral water.
EXCLUDE: Soda pop or soft drinks, alcoholic beverages, coffee, tea, other caffeinated beverages.

SPICES AND CONDIMENTS
INCLUDE: All spices unless otherwise indicated. For example, cinnamon, cumin, dill, garlic, ginger, carob, oregano, parsley, rosemary, tarragon, thyme, tumeric, vinegar.
EXCLUDE: Chocolate, ketchup, mustard, relish, chutney, soy sauce, barbecue sauce, or other condiments.

SWEETENERS
INCLUDE: Brown rice syrup, fruit sweeteners, blackstrap molasses, stevia.
EXCLUDE: White or brown refined sugar, honey, maple syrup, corn syrup, high fructose corn syrup, candy, desserts made with these sweeteners.

Program:

DAYS 1-6: I follow the above Basic Dietary Guidelines, supplementing it with Xymogen OptiCleanse powder twice daily in almond or hemp milk. This powder provides nutritional support for the body’s natural detoxification mechanism, gastrointestinal health, and anti-inflammatory mechanisms.

DAYS 7-13: From the Basic Dietary Guidelines, eat only from these categories: fruits, vegetables, fats, beverages, and spices/condiments, plus rice. Increase the powder to 3x/day.

DAYS 14-15: Add back bread, cereal, starch, and milk substitutes from Basic Dietary Guidelines.
DAYS 16-18: Add back legumes and nuts and seeds.
DAYS 19-28: Add back meat and fish.

After that, I’ll slowly reintroduce foods from the “naughty” list. I check them by eating the purest form of that food (like, if I wanted to check cheese, I wouldn’t get pizza–I’d get the cheese alone and have my way with it) twice in one day for two days to see if I have a negative reaction or an increase in symptoms.

I’ll check my resting pulse before and after eating the new food, and if it increases by more than 10 beats per minute ten minutes after eating food, it’s an indication of sensitivity. I’ll also be testing the pH of my morning urine to check acidity and inflammation and keeping a running dialogue with my doctor about my body’s reactions. My mom will also be a great source of sanity in my life–she’s a certified holistic health coach.

This is my mission, and I choose to accept it! Bring it on!

  • 00:14 @aikidokainwy Yup, I’m getting errors, too. I’ve brought it to the attention of the forum owner, @fredhicks. #
  • 10:40 I slept ten hours. That was awesome. #
  • 11:58 Really fantastic post from @seananmcguire about poverty and ebooks: t.co/EOmYLyxf #
  • 12:24 The Best Science Fiction Books, According to Reddit: t.co/VvtoJJuA I’ve got some reading to do! #
  • 15:03 @jbkuma HAIL THE OXFORD COMMA, BRINGER OF CLARITY, REASON, AND DONUTS! < a href="http://twitter.com/priscellie/statuses/115138874732326912">#
  • 15:05 Dear Priscilla, Stop vomiting history all over your short story. It’s unnecessary to the plot and no one cares but you. Love, Me #
  • 16:04 @Todjaeger It’s open to any fan! The RSVP is just a head count, so I know how many lanes to reserve. Will you (and friends) be joining us? #
  • 16:24 @Todjaeger Sweet! See you there! #
  • 17:04 @seananmcguire Thomas is a catcube! Or whatever passes for cubes on BSG, because the corners are beveled. #
  • 22:29 Bowling for Butcherites attendees can has much boozahol. I love that my iPhone now recognized "boozahol." #

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  • 07:32 There is no possible way today can be a Friday. It has to be a Saturday, right? #tgis #
  • 08:22 @xiehicks I’ve dealt with thyroid issues and hormonal imbalances for years. I’m curious to see if I can heal them by changing my diet. #
  • 08:44 Every fiber of my being was resisting going to work, so I reread a letter that always makes me tear up with joy. Ready to face the day! #
  • 11:45 @SheckyX Y, because people like me. #
  • 14:00 Excellent post trying to make sense of the conflicting accounts the gay in Y A mess: t.co/mYSrO3QW #YesGayYA #
  • 14:00 (that link was via @ksmccarthy24, I should mention. Thanks, Katness!) #
  • 15:22 My #fridayreads are ONE SALT SEA by @seananmcguire in dead tree format and THE MAGICIAN KING by @leverus on audio! #
  • 18:40 "Mirror, Mirror in my room! Who shall face a stylish doom?" #
  • 20:25 I bid dairy farewell with @biggayicecream’s swoonworthy Monday Sundae. There is nothing as delicious in the world. t.co/CQMW96yW #
  • 20:57 Lucas, ta ke note! Spielberg finally admits the walkie-talkies were a mistake: t.co/lncYT0yM #
  • 22:40 @biggayicecream I’ll be back for your fruit juice popsicles. You’re not getting rid of me that easily! :D #
  • 22:43 Surfacing briefly from ONE SALT SEA to report that @seananmcguire is ONGAWESOME. And back to reading! #

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  • 07:52 My fellow Whedonista, @TeresaJusino, wrote a great piece on geekiness and kink. Check it out, and give it 5 teacups! t.co/JHxPUYhe #
  • 08:21 Haha, YES! Tom and Lorenzo rip the Miss Universe 2011 National Costumes! t.co/6IHmfe5t t.co/vDAJS6b3 #
  • 09:58 So by Pat Robertson’s logic, if you murdered an Alzheimer’s sufferer, it would be okay, because they were already kind of dead? DIAF, scum. #
  • 10:02 I’m amazed Pat Robertson can argue someone w/ Alzheimer’s is "sort-of" dead, but removing Terri Schiavo’s feeding tube is "judicial murder." #
  • 10:10 My grandmother has Alzheimer’s. I may be taking Pat Robertson’s screed a little personally. You don’t talk trash about my Grandmommy. #
  • 10:40 Nightmare fuel: t.co/ODZLh2ye #
  • 16:55 According to my recent blood test, I’m allergic to eggs, dairy, soy, gluten, coconut, & spinach, w/ mild allergies to apricot & trout. #FML #
  • 16:57 Coworker recommended a restaurant to me. Look at the first two pages of the menu. t.co/ewTyNmEE #
  • 17:05 @ardentdelirium I wonder what percentage of orders of that item are on a dare? #
  • 17:10 @Cujo_Hendricks I would be very, very careful around someone in your world who claimed to have a garlic allergy… #
  • 19:23 FANTASTIC fanart for @BrandSanderson’s Stormlight Archive, Disney, and more! t.co/r39hhzvr #
  • 21:29 Ancient Aliens has leveled up in crazy. NAZI EPISODE! Briiiiiing iiiiiiit. #
  • 22:35 @fredhicks Indeed. The level of suck is high. I am the Queen of the Land of Sad, populati on: me. #
  • 23:14 @Chaoticmuse @fredhicks My mom is a nutrition coach, so I’ll get plenty of advice and emotional support! #
  • 23:36 @ravenofoctober I am rooting for Anya, because she’s a good designer and she has the same hairstyle as one of my OCs. *shifty eyes* #
  • 23:46 Today I learned Cinco de Mayo is not Mexico’s independence day. That would be today. Feliz Grito de Dolores! #

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  • 08:29 Squee, the first episode of @janeespenson’s @teamhusbands is up! This is going to be so much fun. t.co/fbyOJTP #
  • 08:34 @rekjackson Oh god, why did you have to remind me that site existed? Brb, buying ten thousand socks… #
  • 09:38 @CUnderkoffler It took me months to realize Gwen wasn’t saying "I ain’t no holla Batgirl." #
  • 11:01 Just got my ticket to John @Hodgman’s THAT IS ALL release party in Brooklyn! Luxuriate in COMPLETE WORLD KNOWLEDGE. t.co/Cknq7Lc #
  • 11:16 Coworkers planking on office equipment. Mass hysteria! #
  • 11:59 Sweet! $15 for $30 Worth of Artistic Tees and Accessories from Threadless – t.co/0S2rtcn #
  • 12:03 @seananmcguire Gotta love those moments when you venture out into the world and suddenly question, "Am I fully clothed?" #
  • 14:09 Mediterranean falafel sandwich from Crisp = foodgasm! t.co/irJPm7C #
  • 17:23 "If you want to be pedantic, which we all know I do…" –me #

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  • 01:11 @inkblabber HUZZAH! I shall gladly shoulder the burden of your squee. #
  • 08:14 Today’s LivingSocial: $20 worth of Whole Foods groceries for $10! t.co/wvcExUd #
  • 08:47 3 of 5 stars to Hammered by Kevin Hearne t.co/17Gd7y9 #
  • 10:06 @fourteenacross Are you softwarebreakingup with it? #
  • 10:23 Good morning! t.co/sbaWTS2 #
  • 10:24 I finally got to start @seananmcguire’s ONE SALT SEA this morning! ::flings love at all the characters, and at Seanan and her kitties:: #
  • 11:20 @ShannonKButcher @kierabot @sherlockbones @anglophile80 OMG, I just came across Jim’s K-6 yearbook photos. D’AWWW, I wanna pinch his cheeks! #
  • 11:43 @SheckyX @ShannonKButcher @kierabot @sherlockbones @anglophile80 Only with Jim’s permission. I’ll ask next time I see him online. #
  • 11:45 @SheckyX @ShannonKButcher @kierabot @sherlockbones @anglophile80 NYT-bestselling dog-washers deserve their privacy, too. :D #
  • 12:19 A coworker let me try on his sweet shades. TO THE SCIENCE ROOM! t.co/kttzvQP #
  • 12:25 Squee, six books left to meet my goal of 52 in 2011! Shame I won’t have long hours at work to listen to audiobooks next year. Oh, wait. :D #
  • 12:25 @ljredeye He said he found them on ebay. #
  • 12:28 @ljredeye They’re $12 knockoffs. I doubt any branding on them is legit. :D #
  • 12:47 @ironicsegue I’m going back to school! I’m moving to California to study filmmaking. #
  • 13:59 @rdp1973 Moving to California for film school! #
  • 15:40 @SheckyX @Esperacchius @RobJDurand @shannonkbutcher @sherlockbones @anglophile80 I hope you sought medical attention. Those can bleed a lot. #
  • 17:33 WITH CAT-LIKE TREAD! UPON OUR PREY WE STEAL! #
  • 18:25 @RobJDurand It’s Gilbert and Sullivan, dork. XD t.co/GtzQInj #
  • 18:28 @ardentdelirium Huzzah! And now it’s legal in New York! #
  • 18:34 @RobJDurand @myyrdneopia Seriously, dude. You do not want to miss this video. Hilarity! #
  • 21:11 My eye keeps twitching. #
  • 22:14 Whew! There’s one more thing off my To-Do list! #

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